so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
