I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
Even the bartender felt bad for me
Princesses don't give blow jobs
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
God gave him joint rollers for hands
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
