Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
Randomize
