I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
well I can't set my house on fire every night
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
Are you texting me while pooping again?
I'm also playing fetch with the dog
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Randomize
