Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(603): View more from New Hampshire

i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess

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(443): View more from Maryland

a queef is a wish your heart makes.

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(559): View more from California

We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.

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(619): View more from California

do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.

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(845): View more from New York

People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk

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(601): View more from Mississippi

ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have

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(662): View more from Mississippi

you were so drunk when the pizza guy got there you told him that you didn't have any money and would trade him the pizza for 3 Porno movies and he totally did it. I may never have to pay for pizza again

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(415): View more from California

My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.

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(339): View more from Massachusetts

I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join

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