Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
I need you to promise me that the first one to find out our kids smoke weed, takes the weed so we can smoke it ourselves
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
Randomize
