Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
Randomize
