Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
Im about to embark on a date with someone who shit in my car. How did this become my life?
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
Randomize
