Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
Woke up with two cats staring at me. One covered in puke thats giving me a look that says it might be my fault. Where am I? Come get me.
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
Randomize
