I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
She made me go with her to get a pregnancy test since she's missed a few birth control pills. She made me park in the "expectant mothers" spot at CVS and preceded to ask if it would be in the pest control section.
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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