You're gonna have to start calling my house phone from now on
How come?
Cuz 'Dad' looked pretty similar to the word Dane when i sent that picture message
i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
Hey, I can't get ahold of Tommy. Let him know his ex-girlfriend is pregnant.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
Randomize