I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
... drunk me broke the coffee table?
STOP TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF IN THE THIRD PERSON. YOU DID THE THING.
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Randomize
