In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
Randomize
