We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
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