he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
Got pulled over today for going 90 in a 40 zone with my leg out of the window. Still got out of the ticket. I'm getting way too good at this. Wanna trade bodies so we can see if it's my boobs or my charm?
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Randomize
