I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
When you're opening a bottle of tequila with a golf club, it's probably time to stop drinking...
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
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