You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
Randomize
