Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
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