before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
Randomize
