It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
I broke my foot jumping out of YOUR window under YOUR watch. You failed me drunk guardian. You failed.
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
Randomize
