ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
Threw up on the baby. National Tequila Day is the eve of National I'm A Horrible Nanny Day.
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
I don't like kids.
You were literally holding a baby 5 minutes ago
I like them before they learn to speak and after they learn to think.
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
Randomize
