do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Randomize
