She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
I'm going to write a horror movie. It's going to be called "Fat People on a Squeaky Bed" and it's going to feature me laying in bed last night listening to my overweight roommate and her fat boyfriend tossing and turning all night
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
Dude, I work in two hours. Unless you can find Chris Hemsworth and convince him to have a three-way with us, I'm not getting out of bed.
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
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