they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
Randomize
