i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
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