It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
I'm going to get so drunk tonight, I actually feel bad about the 30 seconds of drunken awkward sex I'm going to have with one lucky fat chick.
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
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