I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
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