i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
Randomize
