DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
I didn't notice because vodka
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Randomize
