I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
Do you ever go take a shit and end up sitting on the toilet for like 45 minutes wondering what the fuck you're doing with your life?
Everyday my friend, everyday.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
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