brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
I'm timing the release of my poops to the sound of the machine gun from the video game he's playing in the living room.
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
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