i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
Stuck in the Dallas airport. At the bar. Everytime a flight to DC gets cancelled, I'm takin a shot. Fuck you snow.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Randomize
