you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
I really hope you get sexually violated by a pterodactyl tonight.
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
Send help, water and tortillas.
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
Randomize
