honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
I'm just going to assume my unresponsive booty calls are just preparing for the women's march tomorrow
Randomize
