Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
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