What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
Randomize
