Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
This bar receipt from last night makes no sense
You were wasted and got mad that it was too high so you subtracted 50 bucks in the tip line from the total
I wish that would've worked
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
I just woke up and checked my e-mail, and apparently while drunk I bought a blowtorch. Thought you'd want to know.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
Randomize
