Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
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