im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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