At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
you're a fucking everclear ninja. the whole goddamn formal blacked out. you're the worst dj ever
but I'm the best friend ever. I got you laid
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
