when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
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