dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
I love how my cats smell like pot.
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
Randomize
