please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
Randomize
