is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
i just fell asleep masturbating. I'm no longer surprised i'm single. I can't even pleasure myself.
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
Randomize
