Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
I never woulda thought that back in kindergarten playong kickball that'd i'd be 24 getting plastered in front of the white house and winning a kickball championship in a young adult drinking league
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
Randomize
