entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
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