They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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