there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
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