super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
If hangovers were people John Goodman would be living in my skull trying to eat the back of my eyes
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
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