i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
Randomize
